How to Slow Down and Ditch the Guilt

mindset

mindset

By Jo Morrison, Rare Birds Mentor, Online Career Innovation Coach

Something a bit different form me because right now times are different.

If you are on the go all the time, you might manage a family, you have a satisfying career you love, perhaps you’re part of the leadership team trying to keep the company afloat, perhaps you run a business. Basically, if you’re in charge – a lot – then this is for you.

I’m having conversations with amazingly motivated people who are facing major changes in their business or career. But unlike those who are grappling with all that they have lost, they still have a job or business and they feel unsure, scared or guilty about what will happen if they relax a little. It’s a very different problem – but it’s still a valid one.

It can be hard to share advice right now, everyone is in a different place and stage of processing recent changes. But for my clients, especially my female clients, there can be guilt around splitting their time between keeping their business or career afloat and managing a household that’s at home all day. So this article is mainly for them. It won’t be relevant to everyone or everyone’s situation and that’s okay, but if you’ve read this far I hope you’ll check out the ideas and see if anything resonates for you too, or consider sharing it with someone you know is quietly struggling with their load.

Where I’ve been coaching people working on their businesses or careers, the conversation has changed over recent days and I think it’s important to ride the wave.

Client Quote

I coach motivated people who are used to being on the go all the time. As part of those conversations, we talk about what’s happening in their broader lives. They’ve told me about the changing environment at home, the struggles managing kids and businesses, feeding everyone, the mental load of managing mealtimes and schoolwork and feeling quietly worried that if they don’t continue to ‘step up’ then they won’t have a career or business to go back to.

But that worry doesn’t help, right? That gnawing away doesn’t actually solve anything. It just feels awful.

Your sleep and mental health get impacted, you don’t eat as well as you should, you get ratty with people around you, and yet it still gnaws, gnaws, gnaws away.

Being grounded in right now helps. I’ve been working for myself for about a year and when I worry about where my next clients are coming from I find spending simpler time on things that don’t cost a lot of money helps. Walking in nature grounds our energy. Doing a jigsaw and laughing with a friend helps clear the mind. Considering what we put into our minds has never been more important, I only take in news once a day, and I love programs that make me laugh.

Spending guilt-free time with yourself or your family will set you up for future success. You’ll be happier, healthier, calmer – and open to opportunity.

Ditch the guilt and get grounded by trying out some of these ideas.

Opportunity

  • So you’re all at home; let’s establish a new routine.
  • Write a basic day plan or timetable of what you’ll all do.
  • Consider ALL the hours in a day, and what times of day you work/rest/play best.
  • Include, sleeping, eating times, work blocks, coffee, rest, exercise etc.
  • Consider getting up earlier and then scheduling a power nap or quiet time in the afternoon!
  • More mealtimes can be taken as a family group, but take it in turns to prep and clean up – including the kids!

Consider holding a family or house meeting to talk through what everybody needs now to thrive.

You are a ‘family team!’

Consider writing a list of all the things you personally do, the mental labour as well as the physical tasks — what can be redistributed now or in the future?

Use this time to benefit you and future you.

🎲 Some ideas to help you relax and recharge 🎲

  • Peaceful morning walks
  • Bare feet on sand or grass is very grounding
  • Podcasts — that list you’ve been saving
  • Walking and podcasts are a great combo
  • Restful morning in bed with a book and cups of tea! — because if you can, then why not?
  • Baking
  • Reading
  • Yoga or exercise class online
  • Pick a Meditation app — and start from the beginning!
  • Thinking time, daydreaming, gentle planning
  • Journaling
  • Home beauty day or time in the bath
  • Wine or Coffee Time Zoom with a friend or happy group
  • Craft or knitting or colouring
  • Afternoon couch nap (such a treat!) Spotify has Power Nap guided audio for rest, relaxation and recharging in as little as ten minutes through to 1 hour
  • Board games, Scrabble, cards and jigsaws, the games you know you love when you have time

Mindset

💃 When the world moves on — and it will — think how good it will feel to have used some of this time for increasing your personal peace and wellbeing.

💃 Your family household could use this time to bond positively and learn new skills so that when you return to work or business, everyone will be more self-sufficient.

💃 Focusing on what you CAN control right now in the form of creating a peaceful, calm home life, seems sensible to me.

👐 Be kind and wash your hands 😊